So a few weeks ago I pestered the Epare Scientists to build me a crime fighting robot. Or turn me into one. I’m not entirely clear, and neither were they, and that’s why I wasn’t allowed in the Labs for a good couple of weeks. However, thanks to some ingenious sleuthing (and bribery) I was allowed back into the labs (with a strict “no touching” policy in place) and got to finally address one of the biggest questions I’ve had since I was but a wee writer:
Why do milk and cookies go together so well?
The Epare Scientists actually had some answers, though they insisted that they were “engineers” and “not scientists” and if I called either of them Bunsen or Beaker again they were going to call security. So, ignoring their lack of respect for the greatest scientists of our time, they got down to the science of why a warm cookie and a cold glass of milk are probably the second or third best thing on the planet.
Most cookies, be they chocolate chip or vegan peanut butter, contain a high amount of, for brevities sake, fats. Now you might have fainted when I shared that they have fats in them, but… It’s a cookie. They’re good for your soul, not the waistline. Anyway, cookies contain a lot of phospholipids, which allows foods with a lot of fat (oil, butter) to mix to substances without (cocoa powder, water) - This is why when you make cookie dough from a mix, you want to make sure you get it properly blended less you end up with some weird watery monstrosity.
What breaks down phospholipids? Well, lots of things, but more importantly: Milk! Milk is not only great at breaking down the cookie to it’s base deliciousness, it’s also full of protein which your body requires after being assaulted with a delicious disk of fats and sugars.
It was at this point they gave me a cookie and a glass of 2% in the Epare Double Wall Creamer while they said something along the lines of “stop interrupting us and touching things you are a grown man.” I retorted that I would stop if I got two cookies, and they relented. That’s what you call “negotiating skills.”
It was at this point Bunsen (I told them for three cookies they’d get real names, but they refused) informed me that a lot of people enjoyed their cookies in warm drinks as opposed to cold drinks. This wasn’t unheard of: I know plenty of people who enjoy a nice cookie with a hot cup of tea. They explained that it was due to the natural chemical Methybutanol, which is found in most baked goods. When the cookie is dipped into, say, a nice cup of hot black tea, it released these delicious chemicals and makes your cookie taste extra toasty and delicious.
I then asked them which they prefered, and Bunsen said with an air of confidence that he was a pure tea drinker with his cookies. Beaker told him that was stupid, and then Bunsen informed Beaker that HE was in fact stupid, and then Beaker said Bunsen’s mother was stupid, and then they told me to stop writing down their argument.
So, now we know the best way to enjoy a nice cookie: Anyway you like! Regardless on if you’re team Hot Cup of Tea or Cold Glass of Milk, Epare has plenty of products for all your cookie dipping needs in our Glassware Department!